SharksWithLasers -- Seth Cooper

A CUTTING-EDGE BLOG FOR THE WORLD OF THE 21st CENTURY, Currently operated by Seth L. Cooper, a 27 year-old attorney in Seattle (sethlcooper at comcast dot net)

Wednesday, July 14, 2004

SOME THOUHTS ON HANDCUFFS... During my workout at the gym this evening, I noticed a car in the parking lot; a girl was seated in the driver’s side, and some handcuffs hung down from the rearview mirror. Handcuffs? Is this a new trend that I’ve been somehow missing?

That it is peculiar was not reason enough to catch my attention. What had me thinking on this was my recollection of a girl I twice dated last fall: she too had handcuffs hanging from her rearview mirror.

In all honesty, the handcuffs of the girl I dated had me a little freaked out. When I asked her about it, she complained about how a few guys had given her a hard time about or made cat calls to her while she was on the road or in the city. Well, surprise, surprise.

Perhaps if it had been the handcuffs alone, I would have left it at that. After all, she could have deliberately kept the handcuffs in the car while we were driving around together because she really liked me and enjoyed my thinking she was being suggestive. She was a cute girl, mind you, so I could certainly have considered worse fates than her making use of them on me.

I didn’t actually think of any of that at the time. Instead, I thought I had a wild woman on my hands. The handcuffs complimented the numerous bead necklaces she had around the gear shift of her car. Mardi Gras beads. Regardless of the depths of my own human depravity, I figured that this girl was probably a little to crazy for me. For some bizarre reason, she didn’t quite see it that way. Indeed, even though she partied extremely hard, drank way too often, and thought it “cute” that I actually used swear words less than she did, the girl simply couldn’t understand why I would suggest she was a big party girl. Surprise, surprise--again.

So far, this post has thus has really been about nothing. So I’ll try to wrap things up in a “Jerry’s Final Thought” sort of fashion. Chicks with handcuffs on the review mirror are probably Girls Gone Wild material. You’d probably be best advised to stay away—unless, of course, you really like that kind of stuff. But it’s still probably better to have handcuffs than the fuzzy dice.

(Everett, WA)

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